Thursday, December 29, 2005


We all have them, and this year mine have nothing to do with weight or smoking, but instead, they're about authenticity. Being who I am every moment of every day.

This year I will accept my imperfections, and roll them around in my head and see them through the eyes of truth. I will devise ways to improve on those which do not serve my best good, and I will be gentle with myself. I will look at those things which I've always thought were imperfections, and realize that some aren't imperfections at all, but simply my humanity and I will embrace those and bring them with me into the moments that follow.

Seems like we're wired to review our lives every new year. And mine has been so full of changes and manifestation. Hard to believe that only a year ago my life was very different indeed. Exactly when I decided it had to change eludes took years, and it seems that so much time was spent deciding that I wonder how I managed to get through the tough stuff at all.

And now, the day looks much better, and tomorrow brighter somehow. Ronda says it's time for an adventure. And I think this year will be a great one. A new lover, new space, and new patterns of thought and of being. And the key to all of it is realizing that it's all okay. It's okay to want more, to have more. It's okay to be truthful, no matter what the consequence. It's okay to demand love and respect, to reach for excitement and adventure. To play and laugh and not be sad about the world around me.

And as odd as this might sound coming from someone who has so often looked at herself through the eyes of Piglet - a very small animal, I am fearless. The universe has thrown open the doors and the windows and the sites and sounds of the outside pull me from the safety of the known into the unknown, and I am packing my bags, getting rid of the stuff that might hold me in this place, and making ready for an incredible journey.

And my soul sings little tunes that I can't quite sing along with...but I'm learning the words, and I know it is my song to sing.

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