Tuesday, July 17, 2007

counting down

Today I pulled the elastic out of the waistband of my shorts. Who in their right mind would make maternity shorts with a wide band of tight elastic around the waist? I bought three pair, thinking that would be enough to get me through this pregnancy. As it turns out, with a bit of modification, they do work.

I have entered the stage in which nothing feels comfortable other than sweats, and in 90 degree weather, that is simply not an option. While I do feel blessed that this pregnancy has been relatively easy...not much morning sickness, no headaches, only occasional heartburn, normal blood pressure and minimal weight gain...I am beginning to feel the irritability and the fatigue. When I feel it coming on, I try to stay positive and do something that makes me feel good...like eat hot fudge sundaes - a tasty, but temporary, fix.

The baby's room is almost finished and looks adorable. After a road trip to Ohio for a baby shower attended by many aunts and cousins and friends, we're set. If the baby were to come today, he would be born into a world where everything has been arranged for his ultimate comfort and joy. What a lucky kid, no?

I though, am not sure that I am prepared for the day when he decides that it's time to come out and take a peek into the world. Though I have shied away from reading about everything that could go wrong, I do know that labor is painful, and that it could be a long and grueling process. I'm sure that I have absolutely no idea what it will be like, but have opted to stay away from medication for pain unless of course I change my mind mid-delivery. This from a control freak, of course, who believes that the more I can "help" with strong, sensitive muscles, the easier it will be for the baby to make his entrance. I suppose we'll see.

And so I am counting down the days. My scheduled due date is August 30, but a voice whispered in my ear on waking one morning..."August 10." As I am one who believes that the universe often whispers information straight into our ears should we choose to hear it, I'll be ready. The frightening thing is that August 10 is just around the corner...whew...here we go.

The baby is moving around as I type this, reminding me that my life will be different in the days ahead, and that ready or not, he's on his way. It's comforting to feel him and know that he is well. Today we will listen to lullabies as I hang the curtain in his room and put the final touches on the walls. He will be my baby and I will be his mommy, and we will both be loved in the way only mothers and their children can know.